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I should tell someone

someone should know that we fall short… or stand shy. yeah the positive and holy, …. that wasn’t ever truly communicated .. holiness..

it’s so easily corruptible, changing like natural light.. falling like natural night
if the car is running but the mind is running the heart is running and the soul is cowering.. I knew… the moment she said over compensating… I was bringing that dog sled down into the grass.. nothing is as filthy, nothing as easily ameliorated.. as the past… I should tell someone..

I keep thinking I was better thinking about having something… than actually having it.. those errant movements and all that jargon bought from the planet before the glazed over sewn ups..dragging and swiping…admitting

my eyes are dying… the world is dying..thankfully

this isn’t about shying away and wearing suspenders.. or maybe fighting a fight.. without throwing attention at the conflict… feeling and ignoring simultaneously …. this isn’t about me and it isn’t about her… though it may all together be about the fear of actually fucking winning…. shirt too tight to breathe…. winning in a different pair of ideologies.. I was already crazy… the shit I disallow .. loving me….. wait I’m only loving you … all of this at the speed of a baseball…. I miss the mechanics..

art credit : Flowers Where Your Face Should Be//The Wonder Years